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June 27, 2002

MY FIRST DIARY ENTRY!

Diary entry April 7, 1971…

Today I had school. We had arithmetic at a different time because we had church. Also, the bus was late. After school I played outside. My Easter holidays started at 3:30. For supper I had chicken, & chocolate pudding for desert. My father gave me this diary today. Today I had Judo. Tonight I made two pencil holders. I made a picture of mars with earth-men on it. I had sore fingers, now they are getting better.

Diary entry April 25, 1971…

Today I woke up at 8:45. After I watched programs. After two programs I read some books. After I had breakfast at 11:00. Then I started my homework at 11:35 but I was interrupted by my friend's first communion celebration so I went to his house for a piece of cake. After, I went to Bobby's house & found out he was going to a prehistoric museum but I couldn't go. But soon, my kind, nice father let me, so we went. My dad bought me a fossil.

Diary entry May 2, 1971…

Today I woke up at 9:50. I had breakfast & then we went to find a summer cottage. We had lunch at "Au Petit Lutin" in St-Adele up north. When we came back I went outside. After a good supper I rode my bike. I came back home to have a bath. After, I watched Ed Sullivan. After, I did yoga. I read a Mad Magazine & went to bed at 9:30.

Diary entry May 14 1971…

Today I had school. I bought a Charlie Brown book, "Good Grief, Charlie Brown" because of a good report card.

Diary entry April 9, 2000…

Just jerked off to internet porn for the third time today. Didn't do shit else all day but sit in front of the boob tube. And I have ten tons of work to do. I'm fucked up. I dropped the ball again. It just snowed all over my fucken bike tonight.

June 20, 2002

FREE VINTAGE MTL PUNK MP3! THE ELECTRIC VOMIT (CIRCA '78)!

Here's a slice of life for yuh. I'm half frog (bilingual) & I'd be Frencher if my folks hadn't sent me to English school. I answer my mom in English even though she speaks French. She hates my French because it's too street slang, even though her mouth is more foul than mine (French-Canadian cussing is tops). Quebec strongly discourages the use of English by law, no English signs allowed in public for example (except for, say, the likes of "Burger King" for some dumb-ass hypocritical reason). When I was a kid hackin' around with my Anglo pals, I'd be squirming whenever they'd start needling frogs. But I was in a peculiar predicament likewise in reverse hangin' with French chums when they were plotting surprise attacks on local "blokes" (anglo slur). I felt like a spy/traitor in either camp just waiting to be exposed. Punk rock came just in time for me to air my grievances. Here's a song that tried to address this silly schism, NO END, by my highschool band The Electric Vomit (circa '78). We recorded a half dozen tunes at this session & Carlos Soria was on bass (before he joined his little brother's band, The Nils), Rabid Roy Random on vocals, Guy Lapointe on drums & I played guitar, wrote the music & lyrics. "Cultures don't dissolve, they evolve," my ass. I've been devolving ever since.

NO END

© Rick Trembles 1978

Stop hating us & we'll stop too, Says the Frenchman to the English, No we're stronger so fuck you, Says the English to the French, Meanwhile… Bilinguals... Don't know who to choose as friends, It'll never end, Without another little war, For the old men who like the glorious gore, Only to come back again, Sweet revenge, sweet sickening revenge, That we don't wanna be involved in, Cultures don't dissolve, They evolve! Just let the youth be uninvolved, We're sick of seeing stupidity, And we want to end it now.

(Note: We're sorry but the link to this MP3 has been removed in order not to conflict with potential sales of the upcoming Garbage Bag Records 7-inch Electric Vomit release summer 2007)

June 13, 2002

...No! Not Dee Dee... Damn it, he was the most realistic Ramone.

STORYTIME: "EYEBALLS" by Rick Trembles (based on an actual pal with twitch-wink problems)... (pictured right: Trembles illo that accompanied the story in his 1978 zine, High School Daze #2, which included, among other things, a raffle for Ramones LP Rocket To Russia & an early Chester Brown comix page)

Kid's thoughts at toilet…

Gee… what if last night, a scientist put microscopic video-cameras in my eyes whose visuals are transmitted to my classroom where all my classmates are staying in late to experience this experiment the scientist is performing for them & are now all laughing at me doing wee-wee!!

Next day…

Yes they did put cameras in my eyes… My friend's looking at me strange 'cause it's hard to hold it in! They haven't told me 'cause the experiments aren't completed yet!!

Is this kid fucked up!!??!

Well, he grew outta that, but later on, having been influenced by rock & dope, he practices his psychedelic glare in the mirror, thinking it will help him be freaky, but never really performs it in public (unless he's on some specific drug & doesn't even realize he's doing it).

Now…

In connection with childhood memories of winking at a friend when lying to another, he's picked up a bad habit of twitch-winking his right eye whenever he suspects that someone thinks he's lying!!

Wow!!

But our poor hero's story ends happily… Having gone to World War 3, our friend's eyes somehow got poked out during combat, ridding him of all his eyeball problems!

The End

June 6, 2002

Diary Entry: MANIFEST DESTINY

(Pictured right: How to make an "exquisite corpse." 1: Fold a piece of paper in three. 2: Get someone to draw a head without letting anyone else see what they're doing. Make sure the edges of the neck pass over the fold slightly so that the person continuing the drawing afterwards knows where to begin. 3: Hide the head & fold paper to blank torso segment & get another person to fill it in. Make sure the waist or leg edges are indicated on the next fold for next person. 4: Get someone else to finish the last segment. 5: Unfold & enjoy. Examples show critter number one's head by Rick Trembles, waist by singer/cartoonist Dominique Petrin of Les Georges Lenigrad & "feet" by their drummer Louis. The angel below has Dominique heads, Trembles torso & Louis legs)

Saw The Dictators for the first time Wednesday at Petit Campus. Had to see 'em since I bought the Manifest Destiny LP when it came out back in high school & really dug some of the nastier tunes in there sprinkled around the cheesier power-ballads they were genuinely trying to get airplay with. Bad-ass guitar on Young, Fast & Scientific I used to bang my head to. It also featured a killer cover of Search and Destroy & I was hoping they could still boast that kind of monstrousness but they sounded a little tired live. Still, I sure hope I have even that much energy by the time I'm 60 like them. Kind of reminded me of Twisted Sister without the freak-flag. Indeed, one of their early bass players, Mark (The Animal) Mendoza, ended up in Twisted Sister. I liked Wednesday's bass player Adny Shernoff, he had a sort of deceptively minimalist, effortless, stripped-down style of playing that made him look like he could do the shit blindfolded. Singer Handsome Dick Manitoba kept hyping the audience, fists in the air, but there weren't too many people there. This old friend from way back that I hadn't seen in ages had crawled out of the woodwork to check 'em out & was all boisterous how he wouldn't have missed it for the world. He's one of those garage-rock 60's punk purists & he didn't even last the whole show. He thought The Dics had too much of a contemporary pop/metal bent. The fact that it repelled that guy only made me like them more. They're actually STILL trying to get a mainstream hit. Why the hell shouldn't they have one. FUCK all this nouveau/neo-pop-punky wunky resurgence. I don't get these kids today. The last thing I wanted to do when I was 16 years old in a band was deliberately sound like anything that was 20 years old. Who do they think they are, Shanana? The Dictators sound like The Dictators. There's a great online radio interview with Punk Magazine's John Holmstrom explaining why The Dics were so formative to early punk. Scroll down to April 3, 2002, at this radio show archive & laugh your head off listening to Holmstrom's favorite song of all time (hint: it's not by The Dics).

Friday I went to a movie wrap-party for an animated feature I recently did slave labor for. It was a French-from-France production so they had free Pastis at the buffet table that I tried for the first time. Apparently the French drink it all the time at cafes & such. It tastes like licorice, sort of like Greek Ouzo. It's crystal clear alcohol but when you add ice or water from a carafe it turns creamy/milky. You can just keep watering it down so it lasts long & it's cheap. Good summer drink. Then I took the girl that originally found me the job out for General Tao Chicken in Chinatown. I skipped Crackpot later that night at The Barfly because I was too pooped & it looked like rain. Plus I've seen 'em a million times.

Saturday I caught Les Georges Lenigrad at Casa Popolo & we swapped CDs. The gorgeous new one's called "Deux Hot Dogs Moutarde Chou" (translation: 2 hot-dogs, mustard, coleslaw) with one-of-a-kind silk-screened color cartoon art (& a cheesy 80s-a-go-go band portrait taken at a Sears photobooth). They're kind of like Nina Hagen meets The Flying Lizards meets The Residents (Constantinople by them covered on CD). But they're also kind of not. I don't know what the fuck language it is they sing in. Some kind of East-Euro-Trash made-up pretend dialect. English & French thrown in. Mix of organ, beat box, bass, synth, guitar, real drums, cumbersome costumes. Live, they play musical chairs swapping constantly. At the show they did 2 sets. The first had the 2 frontgirls in formalwear eating dinner on stage. As time progressed they started criticizing each others' outfits & burst into a food fight gooped in spaghetti. I thought for sure the audience was gonna get sprayed but no. Drummer Louis ended the set exploding into hard rock cacophony recalling time spent in Da Bloody Gashes (now defunct). Intermission had an endless monotonous recording explaining the dos & don't of swinging a hockey stick (Louis' a major fan). Afterwards, me, Louis & singer/cartoonist Dominique made exquisite corpses (pictured above). Then she bought a Marylyn Monroe pin off the drummer of recent band The Electric End (made up of some ex-Da Bloody Gashes). Les Georges want me to come over to interview them & be in a super-8 movie, so expect an in-depth article on them in an upcoming Weekly Blather.

Back to Casa Popolo again Sunday to pick up a peice of artwork I had up there all month as part of a group exhib (the original Snubdom front page emblem "DEVISIVE DEVICES" for sale in the gallery) & to check out Mia MacSween's vernisage (ex-Gearbox, presently in new band Son Ido premiering at Casa Pop June 29). She did one drawing per day for a long time & is now exhibiting them. There's tons of them up & some are small as thumbnails. I've got my eye on "September 10, 2000" (a squatting bug critter), a creepy one of a spread-legged girl with shaved pubes & the little puppy farting out a star. I had a Bloody Caesar & a Pastis, some cheese & crackers, then gave Mia a video dupe I'd promised her of The Rubber Gun (she knows someone who starred in it), & scrammed home 'round 9PM to cook up a little marinated baked chicken with steamed brussel sprouts, potatoes & carrots. Then I whacked off to some Alisha Klass buttfuck vids & fell asleep.

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